blog.aspergineering.com

How do you tell when someone is lying?
And why do humans have a consistent need to lie to one another?
I allowed someone to lie to me yesterday and nodded my head politely just to see how far he would take it.

This person on the surface, is a very genuine looking and sounding bloke.
His eye contact is great and I only spotted one tell tale eye flutter, which may actually have been confusion over my refusing to engage with him over an electrical cable which we both know is potentially lethal.
Who am I talking about?
The builder!

If you have been following me on Twitter, you will know we just had some minor alterations carried out to the house we moved to.
Because of the builder’s continued promises and apologies, we have made decisions based on the information he has given us, which have literally turned our lives upside down.
Something about this person had me trust him. A part of me always believed what he said and I am still giving him benefit of doubt.
He actually does all the right things to appear trustworthy.
Perhaps at the moment he says it, he actually believes it himself?

I knew he was leaving yesterday never to return, when I made him a cup of tea in a mug with his business logo on it.
After loading all his tools onto his van (to get them out my way) and being reassured he was only loading the things he didn’t need for our job, he made motions to start work.
There was an atmosphere of adrenalin. I could almost feel the panic in the air.
He was making all the right noises, explaining how he would move the furniture around to do the floors and that the replacement bath was at the suppliers.
But he had arrived with a fifteen year old lad and not the Corgi registered plumber he had promised to bring with him, something was clearly wrong.
I sensed he needed to be somewhere else in a hurry.
He seemed late for another engagement and the circular saw seemed to be an important part of it.

He was taking great care to explain everything in way too much detail.
The game became such that he thought I didn’t know what he was doing – while I played along with him.
Why?
Because I think the relationship has passed the point where any genuine communication can take place.
Because I don’t think he is capable of finishing the work.
Because the fastest way to get my life back on track was to let him show his true colours.

I rather hoped he would step up to the mark and have a real conversation with me, arrive at a solution.
He decided to take the money and run.
He explained in rediculous detail that the roller he was about to paint my partner’s office with needed to be replaced and he was just popping out to buy another one.
He promised to return within an hour.
As he reversed down the drive, I looked for the mugs.
They were gone.

Given that we have paid nearly all the monies due for the work, what am I attracting?
Have I been mugged? Or taken for a mug?
You tell me!

See you on the other side of the looking glass,

creative thinker | innovator | visionary